company gm: so what are your skills or talents
company gm: wooooo shit gotdamn boi
I just started watching Liam Neesons On A Plane.
These fuck boys in the airport all…
I just wanna big swole mother fucker to blow my back out and call me princess. That’s my dream man. “Credit 750 so he can get mad loans” Steve or “Is my pussy broke cuz you tearing this ass up” Taheed or “Fuck me at the family reunion while Al Green blasts in the background” Horatio or “ghost ride the dick at a pep rally for a college neither one of us attend” Ying or something. Ya know?
on the dick like
how to subtly approach your crush
When your girlfriend tries to hold your hand before marriage
when a post gets popular after you add a caption to it
- Potential employer: so what's your availabil-
- Me: I AM AVAILABLE ALL THE TIME. ANY DAY. ALL HOURS. I HAVE NOTHING TO DO PLEASE HIRE ME